Couples Toys That Actually Work: What to Look For

Couples Toys That Actually Work: What to Look For

by Jacee Niblett - April 3, 2025

If you’ve been around for a while, you know I’m always singing the praises of sex toys in partnered sex. They’re such fantastic additions, regardless of so many misconceptions — worries about desensitization, competition with your partner, or the idea that toys somehow take away from “real” pleasure or intimacy. In reality, toys can open the door to more accessible orgasms, deeper communication, better collaboration, and even a boost in libido!

That said, not every toy is ideal for partnered play. Some designs and features lend themselves better to enhancing connection and pleasure, so just like any toy purchase, it’s worth considering a few key factors to find the right fit for you.

This week, let’s dive into what makes a great couples’ toy, what to look for when shopping, and how to make sure your new addition works seamlessly with your dynamic.

Find the Right Style

Some toys are specifically designed for partnered play, whether for penis-vagina pairings or other combinations. There are many different styles, so it’s important to choose a design that truly fits your needs— and that might mean opting for something beyond just a vibrator. Here are a few options to consider:

Double sided dildos
Cock rings
Strap ons
App controlled vibrators
Wearable vibrators

Does the toy do what you want it to do? If you want penetration, opt for a dildo style like the Tryst Duet. Just remember to get a flared base for any anal play! For external stimulation, consider an external vibe. If you’re seeking to add clitoral stimulation during penetration, try a wearable vibrator.

Rather than just sticking to a standard bullet vibe, check out your options and find a good fit for your needs.

Tryst Duet 16" Double Ended Remote Controlled Vibrator

How Wearable Is It?

The most important factor for couples toys, in my opinion, is how functional they are. They might be designed to be worn during penetration (i.e: vibrating cock rings, or U-shaped vibrators), but do they stay on the whole time? Do they actually hit the spot in the heat of the moment, or do they slide around and miss the mark?

This will ultimately come down to how the toy fits your unique anatomy - but over the years I’ve noticed some are more fitting than others. For example, I’ve found the Passion Enhancer by Calexotics is a great option for vibrating cock rings because rather than a rabbit attachment it has a wider, broad surface that is more likely to cover more bases during use.

In the same vein, consider how well a toy is going to fit between your bodies or be maneuvered during play. If it’s big and bulky, it might not fit as well as something slim and flatter.

Silicone Rechargeable Passion Enhancer

Is It Versatile?

Finally, I think choosing something that has more than one function is a great idea for couples, especially ones new to adding toys in the bedroom. This gives you the chance to really explore and not be bogged down by the single function allotted to you with the toy.

Something like the Starstruck Fantasy by JOPEN is going to give you lots of options to explore, because it’s small, flat and easily handled. It has a wide flexible head and a convenient handle so you can maneuver it around the body (or bodies) easily.

Don’t limit yourself to one thing - grab something that you can explore with, together!

JOPEN® Starstruck Fantasy

Finding the right toy for partnered play is all about discovering what enhances your unique connection. Whether you’re drawn to wearable options for hands-free fun, versatile designs that offer multiple sensations, or styles that prioritize comfort and ease of use, the best toy is the one that works for you and your partner. It might take some time and trial and error to figure it out, but the good news is it’s a fun process!

Don’t be afraid to experiment, communicate, and lean into curiosity — toys aren’t about replacing intimacy but expanding the ways you experience it together.

As always, be safe and have so much fun!