One of my favorite exercises to have clients try for themselves is practicing body awareness with a vibrator. Although you can absolutely do this practice without one, adding a vibrator can increase sensation which is especially important here. It can also even add a layer of buffering for anyone who feels uncomfortable with any aspect of skin to skin touching of their erogenous zones.

How it works is simple - you just move the vibrator (or your fingers/hands) all over different areas of your body. But while you do this, practice paying extra attention to the sensations you’re experiencing. When you reach your inner thigh, does it feel nice or too much? If you find increased pleasure in an unexpected area, linger there and savor the moment.

This practice is so simple but so powerful if you struggle with feeling present during your sexual experiences. This helps you hone the skill of body awareness and practice relishing in pleasure, rather than just going through the motions. All the way you are collecting information and learning more about the erotic nature of your mind and body!

And finally, toys can help you explore the ever sought out experience of orgasm. What I wish for every person who struggles with this area of their sexual experience understood is that orgasm is sort of like muscle memory. The more you experience it, the easier it becomes. While there are many other elements involved, a simple method of addressing this issue and further exploring yourself sexually is to use the orgasm advantage of sex toys.

Usually sex toys offer higher intensity and more reliable access to orgasm, especially for people with vulvas. In other words, orgasm comes easier when you use a toy. And, contrary to popular myths about desensitization, this can actually be a great thing for reaching orgasm even without toys. It allows those neural pathways to strengthen and gives your body practice.

So, use that to your advantage and give your body the practice of orgasm!