There are phases to love and intimacy, and if you’ve been in a few long term relationships you probably know the honeymoon phase well. It’s that period of time right in the beginning where your brain reacts like it's on drugs, everything is perfect, they are perfect, and nothing could ever diminish that explosive fire in the bedroom!
Until the honeymoon phase starts to wane and a different kind of intimacy emerges. One of comfort, familiarity, companionship, and security. Put this way it sounds nice, but what about the hot and wild sex? Are we doomed to boring sex once we get too comfortable?
I’m here to tell you that just because you’re not high on feel good brain chemicals anymore, does NOT mean that your sex lives have to suffer. Instead of wishing for and pining after a phase that is in the past, you must flow with changes and find NEW ways to get your freak on with your long term partner.
So, if you’re looking for ways to get that spark back - try out these 3 things with a little help from your neighborhood adult store.
1. Massage, oils, arousal gels and MORE
Try slowing down and focusing on sensuality in the bedroom with your partner. Start with a sensual massage, manual stimulation, or a prolonged make out session before moving on to anything else. This could add a new feeling of relaxation, intimacy and connection with your partner. Focus on extending the sexual tension for as long you can, for a better payoff later.
To aid in this endeavor, check out the Slow Sex line by Bijoux Indiscrets. Adding a massage oil, warming lube, or arousal gel to this kind of play can really heat it up and enhance all the different sensations.
2. Get your kink on
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being “vanilla” - but maybe a little kink is just what you need to spice up your current sex life. Adding roleplay, impact play, or restraints to the sex you’re already having can add a new level of fun and adventure. Pretend to be somebody else, experiment with different impact sensations, or thoughtfully revoke one of your partner’s senses to enhance their others. Switch up your routine and try something new.
But don’t forget - consent is key! And BDSM is all about communication of boundaries.
We have an extensive BDSM section in stores, where you can find anything from whips, to handcuffs, bed restraints, blindfolds, and more. There’s so much to discover in this part of the store if you’re new to the BDSM scene.
3. Add anal play to your repertoire
If penis-in-vagina sex is your standard - adding any form of anal play to that equation can enhance the sensations by a lot. Having something in your butt gives your PC muscles something to hold onto. In other words, heightened sensations and a stronger orgasm.
Start small with a smaller size butt plug, or work your way up to something bigger! Just make sure whatever you use has a flared base. Oh, and do not forget lube!
These are just a few suggestions, but there are SO MANY ways to “spice” up your sex life with a long term partner. Adding variety and novelty to a sexual relationship is the quickest way to keep things fresh, and re spark a new desire for each other all over again.
We don’t have to sacrifice hot sex for a secure relationship - we CAN have both!
Get all these items and more at any of our locations. Stop in and chat with us about trying something new - we can’t wait to have you!